Update on Malachi

Just a quick update for all of you who have been praying for us today. Dave and I took Malachi downtown for the sweat test this morning. They did the test but unfortunately they burned/blistered his arm and then he didn't sweat enough to actually cause the test to be successful. So, no diagnosis and no test results today. We have to wait until his arms heal and then repeat the test. 

After the sweat test, I was pretty much a mess. I think I probably cried more than Malachi. We decided to head up a couple floors and visit the specialist we saw last week. Because of Malachi's terrible cough and wheezing, Dr. Elliot got us in to see a pediatric pulmonologist almost immediately. Kathleen is her name. She was so amazing! She spent almost 2 hours with us. Eventually, she gave Cai a breathing treatment which seemed to open up his lungs quite nicely. So, until his little arms heal, my job is to give him breathing treatments at least 4 times a day. Praying that these will help ease his little lungs and help him breathe and in turn, help him sleep!

Thank you all for praying! We will continue to be patient and wait on Him not only for answers for Malachi but for the strength to glorify Him each day, no matter what the circumstances. 

Remembering Ben's favorite verse

When each of my older kids were really little, I made them each a pillow case with all their favorite characters on the front and then a Bible verse on the back.

Today, I am trying hard to apply Ben's verse... which has since become his favorite verse.
     
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths." Proverbs 3:5-6


Since my last post, we have taken Malachi to a specialist. They seem to think most of his symptoms point to the possibility of a disease called cystic fibrosis. A diagnosis we prefer to not have to accept as truth for our little man. I have had a few days to process my initial emotions, do too much research on this disease and think through the possible alternatives. I still don't want any test to confirm this disease for Cai. At the same time I am trying hard to prepare myself for the possibility that God might have different plans in which to glorify Himself through my son. That's where Ben's verse touches me.
I am trusting that, despite my inability to understand the "why's", He will give me the strength I need in the moments I need them. Until those moments come I am choosing to have faith in the truth that He is the great Healer. I am asking Him to heal Cai. No matter what is causing his symptoms.

Tuesday morning, Dave and I take Cai to have a sweat test done that will either confirm the presence of CF or point us in a totally different direction. I am asking for you to pray with us. Please pray that we will be given concrete answers. Pray that we will glorify God in our responses and that we will ultimately be able to help our little man feel better.

I will do my best to update you all Tues evening sometime.

Being "known"

I am so thankful to be "known".  As I have walked through several really tough times, over the past year, I have been so thankful to have friends and family surround me in prayer and at times with a physical hug. If I wasn't "known" by these amazing people,  I'd be walking these valleys alone.... or would I?

I know that, in my last blog, I briefly shared a few trials we have struggled through. Right now, my biggest struggle is being patient with doctors as we seek to find the source of Malachi's discomfort and answers to mind boggling medical issues. This past week I took him back to our family doctor. We have several issues presenting themselves that seem to puzzle everyone.  

1. gut issues

2. low hemoglobin causing extreme bouts of paleness

3. frequent bouts of thrush

4. raspy/hackie consistent cough

5. sleeping difficulties

5. unknown sinus congestion

6. inflammation of esophagus and small intestine

I am thankful that we are not alone in this journey! Not only do we have our friends and family to lean on but most importantly we have Jesus. I am soooo thankful that we are "known" because He is our Creator. He is my sons Creator!

 

Psalm 139 - One of my favorite verses is... 

"For You created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb." vs 13 

To know this fact allows me to rest in the comfort my NOT being in control. He created me. He knows me. He created Malachi. He knows my son. He knows his needs and He knows where we need to seek out those needs. 

Although I am incredibly blessed to not be dealing with a disease such as cancer, seeing my son suffer is not easy. Rarely sleeping is not easy. Being the mom I need to be to 5 other kids and the wife I want to be to my amazing husband isn't easy. Simply being the woman He created me to be... isn't easy these days. All this is why I also love verses 1-4...

 "O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise, you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord."

He knows me. He knows my needs. He care about my wants. He hurts when I hurt. He desires a relationship with me that goes beyond simple awareness of His presence. For these things... I am incredibly blessed. It's on Him that I will lean and in Him I will trust as He leads. My sleepless nights probably won't end anytime soon, my tears shed for Malachi when he's crying and I can't help him probably won't stop tomorrow. My feelings of being overwhelmed and inadequate won't necessarily disappear but I do know that in those moments I am not alone. 

I am thankful to be "known". 

A Year in Review

 This past year has been a year filled with great blessings, crazy fun, silliness, sickness, immense struggles and welcomed personal growth. These verses in Hebrews are ones that have given me both the strength to enter each day desiring to glorify God and the peace to surrender each difficult moment to Him. 

"So do not throw away this confident trust in the Lord. Remember the great reward it brings you! Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God's will. Then you will receive all that He has promised." Hebrews 10:35-36

Here are a few moments in our lives that I think capture 2012 well.

In January, we found out that we were expecting our 6th baby. We were ecstatic about being blessed with another child and a bit nervous about what that might mean for our family.

 In February, we celebrated both Nicolas' 14th birthday and Benjamin's 9th birthday. We are so blessed to have them both in our lives! 

It was also when I started getting extremely ill due to pregnancy. I was quickly relegated to constant IV's and meds to help keep me hydrated. I would end up needing the use of Home Health Care through the month of June. Although I was grateful to see the end of constant needle pokes and start functioning as close to normal as possible, I was extremely thankful to have the blessing of medicine and the constant care of the midwives who oversaw my care.

This month also marked an exciting change for Dave. He would now have another pastor working alongside him! Pastor Jeff was hired as the Pastor of Leadership Development. We have been so blessed to have had him called to serve along side us here in Waukee.

In March, we celebrated Olivia's 1st birthday. As excited as we were for her to celebrate her first year of life, I think we probably celebrated the fact that she started sleeping through the night, regularly, even more. 

We also decided to make the long trip to Florida, over Spring Break, only to have to leave and come home early because I was so sick and we couldn't get an IV to stay in place long enough to fully hydrate me. We were all so bummed to leave so early but thankful for days full of swimming we were blessed with!

In April, we celebrated the dedication of Olivia and the Resurrection of our Lord and Savior.

In May, we simply looked forward to school being over and summer fun around the corner.

In June, Dave and I celebrated our 17th Anniversary. I have been so overwhelmingly blessed to have a man who truly loves Jesus, loves me and loves his children more than himself. I don't know of anyone who would say that marriage or parenting is easy. I do, however, know that each and every moment fought and sacrificed for, each trial prevailed through and every day granted is a gift from God.

In July, we spent lots of time walking around Adventrueland and even more time swimming. We also celebrated the freedom so many have given their lives for... the freedom God has allowed us to maintain.

In August,  Dave had the privilege of baptizing Benjamin and celebrating Kaelyn's 13th birthday. 

In September, we celebrated my birthday and also welcomed our 6th child, Malachi Milan Brooks. He was born on the 29th, weighing 6 lbs 6 oz. Every needle poke, every moment spent kneeling in front of my toilet, every tear shed all dimmed the moment he was born. God is so faithful and blessed us beyond our wildest imagination. 

In October, I was blessed to have Dave work from home part of the time as we adjusted to life (once again) with both a toddler and a newborn. A task that has proven (even 3 moths later) to be even more challenging than we expected. 

In November, we celebrated Anna's 11th birthday and Dave's 39th birthday. We also enjoyed celebrating Thanksgiving with both family and friends (whom we consider our extended family). 

In December, we celebrated Christmas with my bother, sister-in-law and nephew from California and with Dave's brother and sister-in-law from Florida. (as well as my mother and father in law) We had one of the biggest snow storms seen in years sweep through Iowa just days before everyone arrived. Everyone enjoyed having snow for Christmas!

  

 As I look back through this past year, there were many blessings given to us as well as many trials thrown our way. 

One of the trials we were forced to walk through was the divorce of my parents. Those are words I certainly never thought I would utter, My heart continues to hurt but thankfully my life's foundation isn't built with human hands but rather on the rock of my Lord and Savior. He is the ONLY thing that has held me together throughout this unwelcome journey. He is ever so slowly peeling back the different layers of my life that need His healing touch. I am excited to see how He uses even this to glorify Himself though me in this coming year.

Going back to the verses I started with,  my desire is to seek God's will, be obedient to His calling and be patient as He gives me the endurance to wake up each day ready for journey to continue!

Olivia turned ONE!

It's so hard to believe that it's been an entire year since "thing 5" was born. This past year has been both the most amazing year filled with blessings beyond belief combined with sleepless nights and the many trials that come with caring for a very unsettled baby. BUT, she has officially hit "toddler" stage and is walking (trying to run when she doesn't want to be caught) everywhere and curious about everything! Nic, Kaelyn, Anna and Ben have all done so amazing with her. They have all become "mini-moms and dads". Something I'm sure Livi won't love as much 5 yrs from now as she does now. Lol

As if our lives aren't crazy enough, God decided to make it just a slight bit crazier and added a "thing 6". Due date is mid Oct. I'm thinking Dr. Suesd didn't account for this many "things" b/c there are no matching "thing" shirts for 6. Bummer!

Happy Birthday my sweet Olivia!

A Distracted Mom's Lip Gloss

Wow! Things in our household have been a wee bit crazy the last few weeks. (Okay, 'crazier'.)
Benjamin had some tummy issues for a couple days, Nic was home feeling crappy for one day and Livi tested positive for having mono. Let's just say there have been LOTS of "stay home" days for me lately.

Most of you know that, for me, running to the store can be therapeutic as it allows me to step away from the monotony and gets me out of the constant need for household chores... just a long enough reprieve to once again be ready to conquer the loads of laundry, the piles of dishes and the strewn toys once again.

Having prefaced my story adequately, I'll tell you about my total "Mom" moment tonight. Tonight was my Women's Ministry "dinner group" that meets once a month. I wasn't able to attend last month b/c of sick kid's, so I was excited to have and hour and a half to eat sloooowly, chat and listen to the gals in my group tonight.... with NO kids. As I was driving myself there, thinking about a million things and praying a little too, a thought popped into my head... "I didn't even look in the mirror before leaving. I wonder if I look presentable." Not really being able to do that while driving, I thought I could at least put on a little lip gloss... that always seems to make me feel a wee bit fancified, even if my hair was sticking straight up... oh, wait, it aways sticks up now... or if there was snot and/or food staining the shoulders of my shirt. Yes, Mom's you know exactly what I mean. So, I reached for the lip gloss that I ALWAYS keep in the handle of my drivers side door. My fingers found it and my brain just went into "autopilot" .... seeing that Iv'e put lip gloss on a time or two. As I spread the lip gloss over my lips, in between the many thoughts racing through my mind, I thought, 'this lip gloss feels sort of grainy... wonder if it froze? ' Then I thought, ' wait, it taste sort of funny.... WHOA.... what is this?'. Wouldn't you know... I had somehow forgotten that I threw a special something, in that same little nook, for Livi... Orajel! My lips now felt about 10x the size they should be!  I was only about 2 mins from my meeting place and my lips were now completely NUMB! Lol....  A total distracted "Mom" moment.

I was able to laugh about my mishap and still enjoy time with some beautiful women... both inside and out.

On my way home, in the stillness of my van, I was even able to thank God that I had reason for the Orajel smothering my lips. I have 5 beautiful children... all unique and all precious to me. For them, I choose to open the door to many more "Mom" moments with joy and with a smile in my heart.

Today I am Thankful...

Today, I am thankful for my oldest who graciously offered to put Livi to bed. She has had a really rough day. :( Praying for a better night. I think that God knows that without the help of my other children, I might be totally insane.... b/c they already know I am slightly crazy! Lol