Being "known"

I am so thankful to be "known".  As I have walked through several really tough times, over the past year, I have been so thankful to have friends and family surround me in prayer and at times with a physical hug. If I wasn't "known" by these amazing people,  I'd be walking these valleys alone.... or would I?

I know that, in my last blog, I briefly shared a few trials we have struggled through. Right now, my biggest struggle is being patient with doctors as we seek to find the source of Malachi's discomfort and answers to mind boggling medical issues. This past week I took him back to our family doctor. We have several issues presenting themselves that seem to puzzle everyone.  

1. gut issues

2. low hemoglobin causing extreme bouts of paleness

3. frequent bouts of thrush

4. raspy/hackie consistent cough

5. sleeping difficulties

5. unknown sinus congestion

6. inflammation of esophagus and small intestine

I am thankful that we are not alone in this journey! Not only do we have our friends and family to lean on but most importantly we have Jesus. I am soooo thankful that we are "known" because He is our Creator. He is my sons Creator!

 

Psalm 139 - One of my favorite verses is... 

"For You created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb." vs 13 

To know this fact allows me to rest in the comfort my NOT being in control. He created me. He knows me. He created Malachi. He knows my son. He knows his needs and He knows where we need to seek out those needs. 

Although I am incredibly blessed to not be dealing with a disease such as cancer, seeing my son suffer is not easy. Rarely sleeping is not easy. Being the mom I need to be to 5 other kids and the wife I want to be to my amazing husband isn't easy. Simply being the woman He created me to be... isn't easy these days. All this is why I also love verses 1-4...

 "O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise, you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord."

He knows me. He knows my needs. He care about my wants. He hurts when I hurt. He desires a relationship with me that goes beyond simple awareness of His presence. For these things... I am incredibly blessed. It's on Him that I will lean and in Him I will trust as He leads. My sleepless nights probably won't end anytime soon, my tears shed for Malachi when he's crying and I can't help him probably won't stop tomorrow. My feelings of being overwhelmed and inadequate won't necessarily disappear but I do know that in those moments I am not alone. 

I am thankful to be "known". 

A Year in Review

 This past year has been a year filled with great blessings, crazy fun, silliness, sickness, immense struggles and welcomed personal growth. These verses in Hebrews are ones that have given me both the strength to enter each day desiring to glorify God and the peace to surrender each difficult moment to Him. 

"So do not throw away this confident trust in the Lord. Remember the great reward it brings you! Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God's will. Then you will receive all that He has promised." Hebrews 10:35-36

Here are a few moments in our lives that I think capture 2012 well.

In January, we found out that we were expecting our 6th baby. We were ecstatic about being blessed with another child and a bit nervous about what that might mean for our family.

 In February, we celebrated both Nicolas' 14th birthday and Benjamin's 9th birthday. We are so blessed to have them both in our lives! 

It was also when I started getting extremely ill due to pregnancy. I was quickly relegated to constant IV's and meds to help keep me hydrated. I would end up needing the use of Home Health Care through the month of June. Although I was grateful to see the end of constant needle pokes and start functioning as close to normal as possible, I was extremely thankful to have the blessing of medicine and the constant care of the midwives who oversaw my care.

This month also marked an exciting change for Dave. He would now have another pastor working alongside him! Pastor Jeff was hired as the Pastor of Leadership Development. We have been so blessed to have had him called to serve along side us here in Waukee.

In March, we celebrated Olivia's 1st birthday. As excited as we were for her to celebrate her first year of life, I think we probably celebrated the fact that she started sleeping through the night, regularly, even more. 

We also decided to make the long trip to Florida, over Spring Break, only to have to leave and come home early because I was so sick and we couldn't get an IV to stay in place long enough to fully hydrate me. We were all so bummed to leave so early but thankful for days full of swimming we were blessed with!

In April, we celebrated the dedication of Olivia and the Resurrection of our Lord and Savior.

In May, we simply looked forward to school being over and summer fun around the corner.

In June, Dave and I celebrated our 17th Anniversary. I have been so overwhelmingly blessed to have a man who truly loves Jesus, loves me and loves his children more than himself. I don't know of anyone who would say that marriage or parenting is easy. I do, however, know that each and every moment fought and sacrificed for, each trial prevailed through and every day granted is a gift from God.

In July, we spent lots of time walking around Adventrueland and even more time swimming. We also celebrated the freedom so many have given their lives for... the freedom God has allowed us to maintain.

In August,  Dave had the privilege of baptizing Benjamin and celebrating Kaelyn's 13th birthday. 

In September, we celebrated my birthday and also welcomed our 6th child, Malachi Milan Brooks. He was born on the 29th, weighing 6 lbs 6 oz. Every needle poke, every moment spent kneeling in front of my toilet, every tear shed all dimmed the moment he was born. God is so faithful and blessed us beyond our wildest imagination. 

In October, I was blessed to have Dave work from home part of the time as we adjusted to life (once again) with both a toddler and a newborn. A task that has proven (even 3 moths later) to be even more challenging than we expected. 

In November, we celebrated Anna's 11th birthday and Dave's 39th birthday. We also enjoyed celebrating Thanksgiving with both family and friends (whom we consider our extended family). 

In December, we celebrated Christmas with my bother, sister-in-law and nephew from California and with Dave's brother and sister-in-law from Florida. (as well as my mother and father in law) We had one of the biggest snow storms seen in years sweep through Iowa just days before everyone arrived. Everyone enjoyed having snow for Christmas!

  

 As I look back through this past year, there were many blessings given to us as well as many trials thrown our way. 

One of the trials we were forced to walk through was the divorce of my parents. Those are words I certainly never thought I would utter, My heart continues to hurt but thankfully my life's foundation isn't built with human hands but rather on the rock of my Lord and Savior. He is the ONLY thing that has held me together throughout this unwelcome journey. He is ever so slowly peeling back the different layers of my life that need His healing touch. I am excited to see how He uses even this to glorify Himself though me in this coming year.

Going back to the verses I started with,  my desire is to seek God's will, be obedient to His calling and be patient as He gives me the endurance to wake up each day ready for journey to continue!